Saturday, October 15, 2005

phantoms

Wow. As fast as the Final Exams season had come, it’s just as rapidly going.

What does it mean when all you can think of most days is that time is passing you by? And at the speed of light, it seems.


We had our last exam this morning. Well, the last exam for me, at least. I think a few more of my friends still have a Proj Dev (Project Development) exam tomorrow.

What do I care? Haha. I’ve no more exams! for the moment, and I have practically the whole evening to catch up on my sleep. Tomorrow, I’m hitching a ride to Manaoag, Pangasinan. We leave Manila at 0230h.

Sigh. Manaoag. The trip’s ostensibly to accompany a friend. To and back. Probe deeper and I’m really trying to find a balm for my melancholy. I’m hoping that maybe even that tiniest whiff of air that’s from outside of Metro Manila will breathe life back into me. I don’t know. What’s the salve for sorrow? Hasn’t anyone bottled the stuff up yet? (And we call ourselves advanced and intelligent.)


I feel like I’m letting someone else’s pain seep off me.

And I can’t help it because I can’t seem to keep the phantoms at bay. I try to hold them off, but I’m no match for a hundred thousand intangibles. I let the phantoms win. And I watch, as if detached from my own body, as I’m carried off deep into the darkest recesses of the earth. I need to have someone find me. (bring a torch.)

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